October 15, 2014

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day

A day meant to remember.  Yet those of us who have been touched by this will never forget.  We have been robbed of life's most precious gift.  We have lost our breath, our world, our meaning - In some cases we have lost our hope.  We have lost a child.

When we became pregnant with Madison, I was scared.  I knew bad things could happen and I was scared.  As it turns out, I had a right to be scared - however our loss did not justify my fears.  If nothing else, my fear of sharing my pregnancy and later having to explain a loss is nothing compared to having to explain to people that we were pregnant before the girls and suffered a loss.  

Some people think we should just "be over it" or "move on" or simply never discuss it because they do not get it.  And truthfully, unless a person has been touched by this tragedy, they do not understand that there is simply no getting over it or moving on.  We lost a piece of ourselves.  We have lost a child.

Many do not understand.  It is a sisterhood that no one intends to join, a sisterhood that does not willingly extend invitations to join.  It is a sisterhood that exists sometimes in hushed voices, as if talking about it the loss may increase the membership.  Yet talking about it helps, it helps remove the stigma and self-guilt felt.  

Madison was quite possibly the most perfect being Adam and I could create - She taught us so much about ourselves, about strength and about love.  Everyday we miss Madison but we know she is always with us - in the wind that ruffles the leaves or our hair, in the sunshine that warms our faces, and in each rainbow we see.  

There is no forgetting ~ We always remember...