Our First Christmas Home

Merry Christmas 2014

How was your Christmas?  We hope it was filled with laughter, happiness, joy, hope and love.  How was ours?  All of that and more.  

As Christmas approached both Adam and I were excited and holding our breath - Would we make it through this holiday without a trip to the hospital?  Would our girls actually be home for Christmas?  Would we really get to celebrate together?  

Many will not understand all the thoughts and fears that flow through our heads - and honestly, this is okay.  We truly do not want you to understand because if you understood that means you would have suffered through some of the same hardships we have and we do not wish that on anyone.  

Adam and I have been through so much in the past three years that I still tear up when I think about it.  Two years ago, Christmas came and went - I do not believe we actually celebrated the holiday, rather we simply went through the motions.  Two years ago, we lost Madison.  

Somehow Adam and I decided to put a tree, though we did not decorate it.  It held a lone ornament, a tribute to Madison.  I sat and looked at that tree for hours, simply staring at it, wondering what might have been.  I was still supposed to be pregnant, Madison should have been growing inside of me still, instead I was empty.  It was a very rough year.  

Brave Miss Cecilia ~ Christmas 2013
Wearing newborn/preemie clothing

Last year, we were not alone.  Our little miracles were here.  But instead of them being 8-10 weeks old, they were almost 6 months old!!  They had already been here, fighting to survive, showing us everyday what it meant to be brave.  

Zoe & Isabelle borrowing Cecilia's NICU Crib
Girls were wearing 3 month clothing

Zoe and Isabelle had been discharged from the hospital.  Adam and I had held onto all hope that Cecilia would be home for Christmas 2013 - unfortunately it was not to be.  In fact, Cecilia underwent surgery Christmas week to place her line for her TPN.  Steps backward in order to move forward.

Last year, we awoke Christmas morning, packed up Zoe and Isabelle, and trekked the 2 plus hour drive to Rochester to spend Christmas in the NICU with Cecilia.  We celebrated as much as you could celebrate being in the NICU - and at the end of the day, we were together, however we were in a hospital.  It seems most our memories revolve around the hospital.

So this year, as Christmas drew near, we did our best to stay positive.  Do not get me wrong, we loved our nurses and doctors in the NICU, but we really had no intentions of going back to spend yet another holiday there.  The girls did their part and we all were able to be together, at home.

We woke up Christmas morning and said an extra thank you for allowing us all to be together, to be together in our own home.  This might seem like nothing to most of you, but it is all we dreamed about - being home, being together.

The girls were delighted with new presents - toys, chairs, clothes and love.  We cannot thank everyone enough for the time, care, thought and love you put into your gifts to the girls.  Thank you.

Cecilia Hope

Isabelle Grace

Zoe Elizabeth

We hope everyone was able to feel as much love as we did on Christmas and that your little ones, no matter how old they may have grown, allowed you to relive the magic that is Christmas.

All our Love,

Adam, Daneille

Madison, Cecilia, Isabelle

Zoe & Gus

Family Christmas 2014
Adam & Daneille
Cecilia, Zoe & Isabelle
(Cecilia is now wearing 9 month jammies
Zoe & Iz are wearing 12 month jammies)